Hurting and Healing

It’s hard for me to wrap my mind around… Forgiveness. I cannot comprehend it. To pardon someone’s offences toward you – intentional or not, the hurt I feel is real and it seems to be a part of me. How does one forgive? That seems like such a silly question to ask, even to me. It has paralyzed me at times because I just find myself stuck… dumfounded… not knowing how to do it.


Yet, that’s exactly what Jesus did.

He forgave.

And He did this so willingly and freely for ME! 

Salvation is personalized. Jesus died for Maiya’s sins. He forgave me for all wrongdoings against Him. Why? Because He loves me. I have the ultimate example of forgiveness and yet I still struggle. I think that’s where pride comes into play. I struggle even more so with pride. But Jesus loves the humble. He teaches meekness. I can never forgive if I do not swallow my own pride and forever and always remember that all that I do, I need to do because of Jesus Christ. Therefore, when I forgive, it does not need to be for any other reason than because I love my Savior, Jesus Christ.

I don’t think that apart from Jesus true forgiveness is even possible. I don’t know how to do it. I think that’s because it is an act of love. Jesus loved me, so He forgave my sins even when I did not deserve it. In following, I need to forgive those who have hurt me simply because I love Jesus.

But then, the Bible takes it a step farther (uh oh..)

But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either.” -Luke 6:27-29

Jesus commands that we love. Love who? All. Even those who have caused pain.

“For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have?” -Matthew 5:46

I want to be careful to mention that I thoroughly believe that love does not mean trust and it does not mean we agree or support everything they do. To love others the way God intended means to understand that they are a human soul created in the image of God and as Believers we need to show kindness and compassion and through that, Christ.

“And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us…” -Ephesians 5:2

This commandment shows me that love is only possible through the blood of Jesus Christ. I cannot love everyone by my own will. It is physically impossible for me to do so. By nature I am too prideful to love those that oppose me. This can only mean one thing: I must strive with all my being to crave a passionate love for Jesus Christ and that through my love for Him He can love others through me. It is not by my will but by His alone.

Because of forgiveness in Christ I no longer have to hurt.

Because of love through Christ I will heal.

It’s beautiful, really. Raw and even hard. But I find that the more I grow up, the more I see that it is the raw, difficult things that we have to battle for – I mean really BATTLE for – that are beautiful. God’s grace towards me leaves me speechless. I don’t understand why He takes such extreme measures to protect and love me, because I mess up so much. But then, that’s just part of who He is… He loves me more than I can comprehend. Because of Him I experience true healing through His love and I don’t have to hurt anymore.

YOU don’t have to hurt anymore because of His love that pours out over us and wraps us in. Forgiveness can be one of the most difficult things to do, but with God all things are possible. Allow God to work in your heart so that you can forgive. Healing and growth are impossible otherwise.


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